As our work reveals spots in us that need work (no pun intended), and as we approach these spots with gentleness, self-compassion, and a willingness to improve for excellence’s sake, we may find that the rabbit hole goes deep, so to speak. Let this be the case, and follow the trail wherever it may lead, to the extent that you wish to follow it. Only in this way (being willing to pay attention to clues that our life experiences may give us) can we truly understand ourselves at the root level and, in fact, get to the root of our stress in many ways.
One of the most effective de-stressing strategies available to us is to simply solve the real problems in our life. We might not know everything about ourselves, but we do know some things. And as we become aware of more problems that need attention, our goal needs to be that we do what we can to address these actual root problems and not just the symptoms (though responding to symptoms is sometimes the only way we ever become aware of something in the first place).
When we are having trouble or experiencing high levels of stress over something, we can ask ourselves why we think that is. Sometimes the answer is obvious. Other times, we may need to look back in our lives to see if we can remember a time in our life (such as childhood) or an experience (like in school) that may have tainted the waters for us or that might have set precedents or served as a model that we have followed. Some if not much of the way we respond to stress is learned—meaning that we learn how to respond to stress by observing others in how they handle stress. If we had helpful examples, then we have been fortunate. If we had unhelpful examples, then much of what we must do now is un-learn.