You Can Do It

We Don’t Have to Be Mean about Anything!

We can accomplish our purposes in life without being mean and nasty about it.  We can!  Yes, we can!  Once we realize this and see how it works in real life, it grows and grows like a snowball we roll on the ground to make a snowman.  We can have what we want without resorting to negative and hurtful tactics!  This is a revolutionary concept for those of us who know the passive-aggressive world (and, unfortunately, the aggressive-aggressive world) all too well.  Let’s not perpetuate these unhelpful mechanisms.  Let’s start and propagate something wonderful in our families.  We can still be the parent and be the one in authority without being a witch or a jerk about it.  We can hold our children accountable without making them do what we want them to do (coercion is a tricky thing because it often brings about the opposite effect that we intended—think about how we were raised and then it makes some sense).  We can be confident in our position as parents while also being loving and gracious and kind and understanding.  Our children will respect us so much more when we’re the parent but are carrying out that responsibility with judiciousness and sensitivity.

And care!  Let us carry our responsibility with our children with care.  Remember to look your children in the eye as often as you can when you are speaking to them or when they are speaking to you.  Give them your full attention.  It is important that we make positive deposits into the relationship we have with our children so that we will be able to successfully make the withdrawals when we need to.  This is the trick to effective parenting!  Tending to the relationship we have with our children.  We don’t have to be mean about anything, then!  We can have the confidence that we need to know that we are doing right by our children.  And we can also know that we are doing right by ourselves by not sabotaging our emotional equilibrium or the fair and balanced relationship we desire to have with our children.