It’s the unhelpful actions we take and the disrespectful way we treat others that we need to put the brakes on—not the fact that we are feeling our feelings. That is, feel what you feel, but then let it go as soon as you can. The feeling of emotions and then the releasing of negative ones likes anger is what keeps us healthy on the inside. If we neither feel nor let go of our emotions (the negative ones in particular), then we are not making the process of healing any easier on ourselves—it makes our desired journey of getting-better harder if not even less doable/attainable than before when we were suppressing our feelings. Remember that we are supposed to feel our feel-ings. We needn’t act on them all (or dwell on them beyond simply acknowledging that they are there). But we do need to feel them. And then we can let them go. And then we can choose how we want to act without being controlled by how we feel. We, then (in essence), are learning how to control our emotions before our emotions control us.