Consolation Thoughts

Be Done with Parental Meltdowns

Are the parental meltdowns still happening?  If so, you aren’t alone.  It takes a while to kick the habit.  Here’s a simple thing to keep in mind: instead of yelling (about anything, even if it’s justified), just go to whoever you are trying to communicate with.  Go up to them and talk closely to them.  You will find that you do not need a loud voice at all, and you will realize that it’s way more effective than shouting from a distance because now you have their attention.  You are in their space (well, we are close but not too close—personal boundaries still apply!).  You are free to speak softly and calmly.  If it’s a mess you want your children to clean up or something else that you’re upset about that you want them to make right, you just request it from them in a regular voice—even a soothing and reassuring voice.  You don’t have to yell when you are up close and personal with them.  It may require us to walk a few steps to get to them (steps that we really might not want to take because by this point in the day we are so tired), but a few extra steps are worth the trouble if it gives us an easy out from yelling and if it gives us a path to a much more effective method by which to win cooperation.