Well, here we are! If we haven’t allowed ourselves to do so yet, let’s enjoy the view! Let’s take it all in. We have done our part to get here, and we have trusted in our God to see us through. We do not have to give any of this away. We are used to that—giving away what we have earned, what is rightfully ours, what is no one else’s to take. But it’s time that we end that kind of dysfunctional living. We have children to keep raising and a spouse to continue to care for and a home to keep homey. We are giving plenty “away” in terms of giving of ourselves and investing into others. What is always ours to hold is our confidence, our sense of worth, our health, and our happiness.
There was a time when we thought we didn’t have a right to even want to have any of that. But you know what? We were wrong! Somehow, we got it wrong in that department. The one thing—the only thing—that is ours to have and hold and protect and nurture is our personhood. Yes, God holds us in his hands so that we don’t have to strive about it anymore. But what I am getting at is taking personal responsibility for ourselves and our lives and our choices. There is plenty that we cannot control. So it’s important to identify what exactly we can control and what we do have control over. Simply put, our own choices!
And the reason why this is important to grasp is because understanding the kind of autonomy we have in this life will help us to become the child-friendly parents that we long to be. We are no longer victims of our own childhood or of our own social experiences or of our own circumstances. We choose how to proceed from here. We choose how to think about things, we choose how to feel about things, we choose how to anticipate things, and we choose how to respond to things. That’s it. Anything else beyond that (redundant) is more than what is ours to carry.
The freedom we now have to live and enjoy our own lives pours all the more into the influence we have over our children and our spouse and our family unit as a whole—for all of us to live and enjoy life and (what is more) to live life well.