Child-Friendly Parenting

The Way that We Communicate

Let the way that we communicate foster openness, trust, and loving-kindness.  If something bothers us, it’s important to talk about it in a respectful way.  If we sense that someone else (like our children) seems bothered by something, it’s important to check in with them and see if we can help them in some way.  Sometimes listening is the best way to help.  Other times, there might be something specific that we can do to help the other person (like our children) feel better.  Some main messages that we can convey to our children (for example) through our words, actions, and willingness to listen are messages to this effect: You are valued (I value you).  You are loved (I love you).  You matter (you matter to me).  You are brave and strong (I believe in you).  You’re going to be okay (I am here for you).  You are special (you are special to me).  You are awesome (I think you’re awesome).  You are safe (I will protect you and take care of you).  You are secure (I will comfort you).  Everything that we say and do and think can radiate these messages.  The way that we communicate to our children (and others in our lives) can support the attitudes we have and hold towards them.  If we want an open, trusting, and loving relationship with our children, we can send that message in the kind of words we use and the kind of actions we take and the kind of interactions we have with them.  The way that we communicate is more than mere words.  It’s about a lifestyle of love and acceptance that we lavish freely on our children.